me and a simple life who tries desperately to persuade me that it's difficult and cruel!
I know there are some rules for human relationships, but the thing is I do not like some of them! They seem unfair to me! seem unworthy of following... rules to attract people and to keep them around by ignoring policies! these are the ones that annoy me, and at the same time, I am noticing that most of them are true......... in some ways!
why human beings should be stupid about recognizing care and love! there may exist a king of physical law of attraction/repulsion in this regard that I'm missing. Up to a specific time and level of care it attracts and after that you have to lessen the care to some level ...keep it...and then raise it again! must have a complicated equation or maybe a simple graph like the Sine one!
OK, girl...why do you expect perfection! why keep complaining about this trait of human being. you know we are creatures with lots of flaws, you used to lecture about how animal we are and we have to accept it and live with it! so why not now?! why can’t you accept this! why you became an idealist again! here is your fact: human beings cannot take lots of attention! they will feel heavy and break. You have to feed them gradually; give ‘em a shot of love/affection and then let ‘em go and digest it.. ..then grab them again and give ‘em the next shot. They don’t get happy with swallowing couple of shots all together, although it may sound tempting and cheerful, they will throw up on you, all the love and care you gave, in the end!
Human beings are most likely slow at conceiving, conceiving value of care, distinguishing care from neediness. Probably that’s why they throw up. Experience would probably help -- or some bodies just remain sensitive to shots of attention forever-- them to digest all shots at once and feel the happiness, to start realizing that the person who cares about you, not necessarily needs you... cares cuz it’s beautiful and warm... cuz it connects … cuz it holds.
But still... There is a trade, … living smart or living you!?
Cambridge, Ontario ...... Aug 2011
